Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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