Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
