In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Randomize
