you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize