Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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