I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
