He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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