It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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