Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(415): View more from California

WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!

(650): View more from California

LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!

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(513): View more from Ohio

stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight

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(951): View more from California

My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?

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(801): View more from Utah

Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes

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(804): View more from Virginia

I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!

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(916): View more from California

We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate

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(956): View more from Texas

Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.

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(256): View more from Alabama

Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?

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(513): View more from Ohio

Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.

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