we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
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