he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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