Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
