marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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