Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
