Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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