her vagine was all disorganized.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Randomize
