apparently the secret to your success is patron
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize
