so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
