But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
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