I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Randomize
