we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Randomize
