That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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