I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
