Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
