redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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