I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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