My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
