For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Randomize