Your face is a jimmy john
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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