it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I'm passing your future prison.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
