You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
