She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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