idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
