mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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