Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Randomize
