Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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