She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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