ugly people sure do ruin things
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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