Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize