Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
He felt like a one man threesome
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
