Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Randomize
