You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Randomize
