better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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