check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
