i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
