I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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