His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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