we made out on top of his cat.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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