Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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