Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I wish I only lived at night.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Randomize
